My Vision of The Iron Rod and Tree of Life

I just had a vision.

There is a story in The Book of Mormon about an "iron rod", leading to a "tree of life", and people holding onto that iron rod in order to get to the tree of life. Next to the iron rod is a "mist of darkness", and on the other side of the mist of darkness is a "great and spacious building", full of people pointing down and shouting at the people holding onto the iron rod. The interpretation by Lehi, and indirectly Joseph Smith (who interpreted the story supposedly by vision from God) is that those holding onto the iron rod are the righteous, and the tree of life is salvation and exaltation in the Kingdom of God.

While I have my doubts about The Book of Mormon, let's assume it was a real vision that Joseph Smith saw as he interpreted the story of Lehi. What if Lehi, and Joseph Smith got it wrong? Plato talks about a cave where people inside see shadows on the wall, assuming those shadows are reality. What if, instead of a path to righteousness as Lehi and Joseph Smith interpreted, this "iron rod" story is actually the story about the people in the building, who have a view over the entire world, and the beauty of it all? What if, instead of pointing their fingers in scorn down at the people holding to the rod, the people in the building are actually shouting at the top of their lungs that they're a much more beautiful world, and much bigger story if the people holding to the rod would just turn and listen? What if the river is the chasm that those holding to the rod have to go through, tearing their lives and hearts apart as they get to the building where they can see the entire picture? What if the iron rod is actually Plato's Cave and the great and spacious building are those outside the cave, looking in?

On the other side you see things differently. You see a whole new world without boundaries, and now instead of just one story about a narrow, tunnel-vision group of people focused on salvation, you see everyone in the picture, and a world of suffering, while those holding to the rod judge those that are lost, and on the other side. They don't realize that they're actually the ones who are lost.

I feel free. I feel like I have a view of not just the iron rod and tree of life, but the entire world around me, the people suffering within, and all those holding to the iron rod unable to see the people who are suffering!

"Twas blind but now I see"... This is MY vision, and the clay has been wiped from my eyes.

You can read the story here: https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bofm/1-ne/8

Faith Journeys: Leaving Mormonism and Religion Cured My Obsession for Pornography

A well-intentioned and very kind-hearted Mormon Bishop on my feed deleted a comment I made on a post of his where I talked a bit about my obsession for pornography as a Mormon and how it ended when I left. It was probably my first admission publicly that I had an obsession with pornography when I was Mormon. I was going to wait to post this, but feel I need to now, in order not to be silenced. Being silenced by my local ecclesiastical leaders for making intentionally and extremely honest and helpful posts to my audience (not necessarily putting the Mormon Church in the best light as a result) was the reason I finally left, after all. I am a free agent now - I can say and publish what I want, and be my true self as a result. You get the honest and transparent me - ALWAYS. I wasn't going to let religion stop that.

Okay - tangent aside, I'll get to the meat of the matter. I hesitate to share this because it IS a matter of judgement and worry amongst most Mormons and religious (and many of my religious family don't know), but the minute people become non-religious they stop worrying about it and stop caring about what people think! By sharing this I risk some of my Mormon and religious friends to judge me and think of me as evil. I hope that's not the case. I hope you live up to your religion and the reasons you stay.

Here it is - I stopped my obsession with pornography when I left the Mormon Church - ENTIRELY. Yes, you heard that right. I was "addicted" to pornography as a Mormon and there were times I couldn't go a day without thinking about it. I obsessed over it in leadership positions. I obsessed over it even when I worked for the Church (although I never looked at it on church-owned computers). I obsessed over it after I worked for the Church. I obsessed over it since I was probably about 14 years old. Arguably, I truly believe that almost every male and some females in the Mormon Church, and perhaps most religions that spend all their waking hours trying to rid the religion of pornography, has an obsession with pornography.

I'm learning more and more since leaving that I was not alone. One thing I've come to realize since leaving the Church is that Ex Mormons and those that are non-religious in general are much more willing to talk about these things, and you learn about all the minute details like this. I have yet to meet an Ex-Mormon who wasn't obsessed with pornography at some point in their time as a Mormon. If the LDS Church wants stats, interview those that leave the Church - those are the ones that will be honest with you!

When I left the Church, to be honest, I didn't try to stop my obsession with porn - developing a new system of ethics and morals, I didn't really care! But what I found is that, naturally, as I stopped worrying about it and having it shoved down my throat every minute and in every Bishop's interview (many of which I just lied as most people do, because I'd get so tired of it, and at times because my own livelihood relied on it), every Priesthood conference (meetings for the male leaders in an area), every Stake Conference (meetings for all members in an area held quarterly), and General Conference (meetings for all members in the Church held bi-annually), and then being taught to teach the youth I was in charge of on a weekly basis not to do it, I just didn't think about it any more. And naturally, I stopped. Completely. And I don't think about it at all and I'm definitely not addicted! I argue most who are non-religious aren't for this very reason.

I keep using the word "obsessed" instead of "addicted" because I don't think most people are truly addicted to pornography. I think most of us who are or were constantly thinking about it and wanting to indulge were simply obsessed because it was something we were taught to feel shameful of. It was something we were taught to be sad about.

Every book I read on the subject was depressing, teaching how we should use the "atonement of Jesus Christ" to overcome, as though it was a sad thing to have these obsessions. I was once told to go to a 12 Step program for Sexaholics because of my porn problem - that too was depressing, people with much worse problems than I had (child rape, adultery, among other things) mixed in with others of us thinking this was something as bad and life-threatening as alcoholism. I only went once because I felt it was making my problem worse. And then I was constantly being told it was an "addiction". It's something you "need to overcome" (see http://overcomingpornography.org for the LDS Church's official stance - it's treated as a sin). I was constantly focusing on the horrors of what I was doing rather than how to treat women right and what "consent" vs. "non-consent" is. It's no wonder I was obsessed! I was not addicted - I was subject to a constant bombardment of how bad a person I was!

It's not pornography itself that is the issue. It's shame, and guilt, and depression that is the issue surrounding pornography, and that exists because churches are constantly teaching, in an almost obsessive manner, that these things are evil. When in reality it's not pornography as a whole that is evil, but rather certain types of pornography where women (or men) are being treated as inferiors, where sex is being forced or manipulated (or implied as such), where children are involved, or where human trafficking is the source of the industry that are evil. Once we stop treating pornography, in general, as "evil", and start focusing on the real problems and reasons we don't want people looking at pornography (without focusing on pornography itself), the obsession, and associated "addictions" will go away. Entirely. I guarantee it.

I share this not to boast about leaving the Church or the benefits I'm seeing, but rather to point out that there are many, many (arguably MOST males and many females!) suffering inside of religion, and especially the Mormon church right now that shouldn't be. Stop treating it as a sin! Stop seeing it as shameful! Get it out of the Bishop's interviews! Get it out of General Conference and the youth and adult manuals for church! And frankly, if it gets you out of this rut, religion is not so important as to prevent you from having a happy life.

I guarantee, the minute the Church, or any religion gets pornography out of religion, the problems, with perhaps a small minute few exceptions, "addiction" to pornography will go away entirely and it will no longer be an epidemic. Maybe it's religion, or the proliferation and obsession over topics like pornography within religion that is the epidemic? Overcome that, and you overcome pornography.

Now, judge away...

New Series: My Faith Journey

Starting today, I'm going to begin a new series on this blog. In reality, it's a continuation of everything else on the blog - my transparent (as I have time) journey in everything I learn and discover on my faith journey in life. You can read back and see my previous posts as a Mormon and see a stark difference in my posts as a former Mormon, for instance. If you want to get into the mind of someone who has gone through this process, this should be a friendly, non-threatening way (no matter your religion) to do this and understand what someone like myself has gone through.

My next post will be a bit of a doozy, although honestly it doesn't seem that big to me any more now that I've left Mormonism. I'll let you find out in a few minutes what it's about but you'll definitely get a much better idea on how transparent I'm about to get.

Following this, I have thoughts on where my belief in God has transitioned since leaving the Mormon faith, as well as Jesus Christ, Joseph Smith, Brigham Young, and many other components of Mormonism. I find many who leave go through a similar process but we don't quite see the process of why they go through what they do. This will be me opening up my thoughts in as transparent a way I know.

Lastly, I want people to understand the challenges someone leaving a faith transition go through. It's not an easy process no matter what religion it is. That said, I'm still more confident, more free, more liberated, and happier than I've ever been since making my decision, and that's all that matters.

Stay tuned - my next blog post is coming soon!

What Do You Do When You Stop Believing? (The FULL version!)

This is the full version of my faith journey, which I shared on June 3rd. This was written back then, but I withheld part only for close friends, and wanted to compile it all for you to see the full story in one today.

I've stopped believing in Mormonism. The truth is I'm struggling how to tell you. I actually wrote out an entire post around my journey but realized that probably defeats my purpose in sharing this. I'm happy to discuss privately with any of you - perhaps I'll write that down and share a link for those that ask, in private so I'm not repeating myself. Keep in mind that I really don't want to argue about this. Contention is not my goal for this. Trust me - I know your side better than anyone.

I have a very public profile online and you deserve to know that. I don't want to offend my fellow Mormons, but at the same time it's not fair to them to think I believe when in fact I don't any more. And the truth is, by just sharing the fact that I don't believe online I risk the fact that the culture and membership I've known my entire life could be stripped from me by church leaders. I love the traditions of Mormonism - the friends I've made there, the people I've met along the way, and the people I've served.

Truthfully, I've been debating how to share this with you. I don't want you to go through the same things I have. They have been gut-wrenching, soul harrowing. The entire principles and culture I grew up with my entire life had been turned on its side. If you begin to doubt and begin to research, you WILL eventually find the same things and have to decide what to do with it. That's not what I want - you need to decide if you're ready for that. I need to be transparent with you though.

I've been asked to do an AMA on Reddit about my story. I've been asked to be on John Dehlin's "Mormon Stories" (UPDATE - I did that - go here to see). I'm trying to decide if I'm really ready for that, or if there's really purpose in my going that direction. Clay Christensen was threatened with excommunication by just being on these shows (he resigned instead). (Also UPDATE: I resigned on Independence Day, 2016 - I'll share some of that later) I do owe it to you to share my story though and let you know where I stand.

Pushed Off a Cliff
Throughout my life I've always made a commitment that I'd be honest and transparent in my faith journey. You can see some of that on this blog. My opinions and testimony have changed quite significantly over time from extremely conservative to somewhat liberal. On Facebook, where I'm more personal, I've shared the good and the bad, and I'm always 100% transparent in my opinions on subjects, and I was even as a faithful member.

You can see that to the point where people within the LDS Church in my own congregation and area were sharing screenshots of what I shared online with my Bishop and Stake President. In fact my Bishop and Stake President called me in - I brought my wife with me (at her request - I have nothing to hide from her) - and condemned me for simply sharing sympathy with Tyler Glenn of Neon Trees, who created a pretty angry video of his feelings against the LDS Church. The post simply said, "A lot of anger and frustration in this video - thoughts?" I'll save those church leaders, who had good intentions, the grief of the details, but suffice to say there was contention, on both sides, in that meeting. Our Stake President told me AND my wife (who didn't post anything) we couldn't go to the temple.

While not offended, I was hurt. THEY were offended.

We walked out of the meeting early. I had been pushed off a cliff. Kicked out the door. At least that's how it felt. I haven't stepped foot back in church since. I understand how Christ felt, rejected by His own people and condemned for believing different.

I'll be honest that I had a glimmer of faith in the LDS Church even when I posted that Facebook post. I truly wanted to hug Tyler Glenn. I could tell, from his video (which has many symbols in it, whether you get offended or not), was hurting. I wasn't trying to draw people away from the Church by sharing it.

Faith in the Modern LDS Church
At that point in my faith journey (which was really just 2 months ago), I still believed that Joseph Smith could be a prophet. I still believed that, despite him sharing 3 different versions later in life of his vision of God and Jesus Christ (one of those which was not both of them), his supposed affair with a 14 year old girl while married to Emma, the flaws of The Book of Abraham translation, etc., etc. (most published on LDS.org or available in the LDS Church's own records archive), that just like Moses and Job and even Peter (who doubted Christ), and many of the prophets in the Old and New Testament, a prophet of God could be flawed.

I wasn't quite sure of the truthfulness of the modern LDS Church though. I worked for 3 years as the first person at the LDS Church managing social media. I worked with every single department of the Church. I set up BYU's first Facebook Page. I set up the Church's first Facebook Page. Before I worked there I consulted to help them set up their first Twitter accounts and the Mormon Channel Youtube Channel. I helped the Church secure a Facebook ad account executive. I helped with the "I'm a Mormon" launch. I helped strategize the Church's response to having a Mormon (Mitt Romney) run for President. I monitored the conversation of members, non-members, and former-members online and truly understood many of the conversations happening on all sides. That's just the tip of the Iceberg.

I'll be honest - even while working for the Church I truly felt the modern Church was true. I felt "the Spirit" there (something I still can't explain - you can feel the Spirit in non-LDS Churches as well, whatever that feeling is - it's a feeling of peacefulness and comfort, something I feel as I write this). Even with the executive clergy (members of the 70 and Quorum of the 12) I worked with, I felt they were truly trying to make the world a better place. They were also trying to defend the Church's existence, but they all had pure hearts. I still love many of them - some of the 12 Apostles know me by name and I hope they know I still consider them friends and love them. I feel while some of them make mistakes, they do get "inspiration" - whatever that is or means. I've seen miracles that I can't explain. I've seen these in other Churches too though.

Mankind, regardless of religion or faith, is somehow connected in ways we don't understand (and many try to explain).

Shortly towards the end of my employment for the Church, and in the years after I began truly studying the history of the LDS Church. Terryl Givens was my Bishop when we lived in Virginia over 11 years ago (before I worked for the Church) - Fiona, his wife was my Sunday School teacher when I was in charge of the Sunday School there. I was in the Elders Quorum Presidency under him as well - I love that man, and especially his dear family! So I truly understood there were flaws in Mormon history, and that many leaders had made mistakes. I wasn't willing to let that stop my faith.

I started realizing the inconsistencies in the Modern Church (Brigham Young and after) - the Word of Wisdom and the fact that all church leaders through at least Joseph F. Smith drank alcohol, coffee, and some smoked tobacco (and who knows what else). I was aware of the fact that the Salt Lake Temple had spittoons in the room for the Quorum of the 12 up until Joseph F. Smith, and we have pictures that still exist today.

The temple too was inconsistent - I came to realize that we don't even know the original endowment ceremony introduced by Joseph Smith. And the one practiced today is not even the one, nor signs or symbols or covenants that was practiced by Brigham Young and many other prophets after. It has changed MANY times over time. That's a historical fact. I highly recommend this book (click on this link), which I feel and felt even as a believing Mormon, was very respectful to Mormons' sacred beliefs on the subject.

Add to that blacks and the Priesthood in the 70s. I worked for the Church when the Church released the statement admitting the Church was wrong. I always encouraged them while working there to be true, open, and transparent, as long as they felt they were true. If true, the truth will work itself out. They were very supportive of that, always trying to share truth when they knew it, as you can also see from the release of The Joseph Smith Papers recently.

The Tipping Point

The tipping point was last October, when the LDS Church put an official (policy) ban on allowing the children of gay couples from getting baptized until they are 18. I'm all for making sure kids are accountable when they join a Church and frankly think age 8 is too soon. However, the inconsistencies of it all make it really hard for me to see that this is an inspired principle. What began my true doubt on the subject was the divorce of my Dad.

2 years ago my Dad left my mom - I'll spare the details (I've shared some on Facebook). He divorced her, and beginning of this year he was sealed in the temple to his second wife, after not revoking his temple sealing from my Mom. For the non-Mormons out there, a "sealing" means you are married for not just this life, but Mormons believe it seals you together after this life, and for eternity. Many say things will be worked out in the next life, but this step really weighed hard on me and my faith in the modern LDS Church and belief in the temple itself.

So my dad, who purposely left my Mom not telling her why he was leaving, and marrying a second wife in what according to Mormon belief truly is polygamy, is sanctioned and celebrated in the Church, and I get to keep my membership as his kid (even if I was under 18), but the children of gay couples in the Church can't??? That made absolutely no sense to me. I was hurt. I was confused. All the previous inconsistencies began to come together and fall. It's interesting how life tragedies can push people to truly seek for more truth.

I began discussing with my wife my frustrations and disbelief in what the LDS Church was doing. I no longer believed the LDS Church, as it stood today, could be true. It was not an easy conclusion to come to, and there is much more to it than what I'm just sharing here.

The Last Straw
At that point all I had was the possibility that Joseph Smith's Church was true, but Brigham Young's wasn't. Could it be that the Church fell after Joseph Smith died? Could Community of Christ, a Protestant Church modeled more after Joseph Smith's original church, actually be that church? Had we completely lost what Joseph Smith set out to accomplish?

Circle back to the meeting with my Bishop and Stake President that I mentioned earlier. I said they pushed me off a cliff. I no longer believed in the modern Church. I was convinced of that (and frankly I would have preferred to discuss that with them than a stupid post on Facebook and the condemnation they ensued on me). I'll be honest I wasn't quite sure what to do about it. I stopped going to Church - it just wasn't worth it any more.

So I needed to figure out the truth of Joseph Smith's church. I began studying real historical documents, on both sides of history. The LDS Church has its own point of view around history that defends its own existence - I saw that first hand working for the Church. The bureaucracy itself is built around defending its existence and that's why you see things like Prop 8 happen. There are also many historians, solid historians, in and out of the LDS Church that have their own views of history. I read all of those.

Without getting into detail, I began to realize that Joseph Smith had more evidences against his story than for it. Look up "The CES Letter" if you want a cliff notes version - I'm not going to try and convince you here, and frankly that's not my purpose of this. Before I knew it Joseph Smith's own story had crumbled. I was no longer willing to say that I knew Joseph Smith saw God, or that the Book of Mormon was written by a prophet, or that I knew Joseph Smith was a prophet. Every time I said that before it was based on evidences (see Hebrews 11:1 for the definition of faith, which I taught on my LDS mission). Now the evidences pointed the other direction, in quite a significant way!

Can We Still be Friends?
I don't want to appear as "anti-Mormon". I don't want to be someone trying to convince others, or evangelizing against the Church. Frankly, I'd still fight for the LDS Church if they wanted to hire me again. I'm still against people sharing videos of the sacred LDS temple ceremonies on Youtube. I'm still against ex Mormons trolling Mormons on Mormon blogs. There are many good things the organization itself does, and like any former employer I enjoyed working for I would do it again if for some crazy reason they asked me. I just don't believe in the doctrines any more. Heck - I may even continue sharing my photos with LDS Create, as I have done thus far.

Lastly, I don't want to offend any of you. I know many of you, especially family, see someone who leaves as not going to the Celestial Kingdom. I don't want you to be sad. Frankly, you can try to convert me in the next life if I'm wrong (which I am 100% convinced at this point I am not, nor do I want to argue about it). I'm not a "sinner". I'm not "offended". In fact I'm at peace. I've prayed about it. I've read the Book of Mormon dozens of times. I've sought out the best books and sought the "Mysteries of God". The truth is I was, spiritually and ethically, moving faster than the Church, and this was my only next step in my life (or eternal) progression. I am completely at peace with my direction in life and I'm happier, and healthier than ever and a better person because of it.

As I've always said, this is my faith journey SO FAR. I anticipate this will change more and more in the future. Who knows where I'll be 10 years, or even 20 years down the road? I want you there with me. I want us to all be friends in our individual journeys.

As I've said on Facebook, my mantra is to be true to myself, and kind to others. God or not (I'm still figuring that out), the laws of Karma and the Universe still exist. What we put into this earth we get out of it. I hope you can join me on this journey, whether you're Mormon, non-Mormon, former-Mormon, or otherwise!

Please, reach out and say hi some time - not as a church leader, a home teacher, or visiting teacher, but as a real, true friend. Frankly, I'm not quite sure I can be sure of that if you have any of those callings and come to me, I apologize - I've held the callings myself and I KNOW I wasn't true friends with many of those I was trying to bring back to the Church. I can usually tell your true intentions - building trust with me is really important at this point. I'm hoping to discover who my real friends are from all of this! You can know if I friend you, I now have have none of those motivations - I expect the same.

I'll try to share what I can as I progress on this blog, so please subscribe! Let's all heal, in our own individual journeys, together. And if you're struggling, I'm here to help, no matter which side of the coin you end up on.

What Do You do When You Stop Believing?

I've stopped believing in Mormonism. The truth is I'm struggling how to tell you. I actually wrote out an entire post around my journey but realized that probably defeats my purpose in sharing this. I'm happy to discuss privately with any of you - perhaps I'll write that down and share a link for those that ask, in private so I'm not repeating myself. Keep in mind that I really don't want to argue about this. Contention is not my goal for this. Trust me - I know your side better than anyone.

I have a very public profile online and you deserve to know that. I don't want to offend my fellow Mormons, but at the same time it's not fair to them to think I believe when in fact I don't any more. And the truth is, by just sharing the fact that I don't believe online I risk the fact that the culture and membership I've known my entire life could be stripped from me by church leaders. I love the traditions of Mormonism - the friends I've made there, the people I've met along the way, and the people I've served.

Truthfully, I've been debating how to share this with you. I don't want you to go through the same things I have. They have been gut-wrenching, soul harrowing. The entire principles and culture I grew up with my entire life had been turned on its side. If you begin to doubt and begin to research, you WILL eventually find the same things and have to decide what to do with it. That's not what I want - you need to decide if you're ready for that. I need to be transparent with you though.

I've been asked to do an AMA on Reddit about my story. I've been asked to be on John Dehlin's "Mormon Stories". I'm trying to decide if I'm really ready for that, or if there's really purpose in my going that direction. Clay Christensen was threatened with excommunication by just being on these shows (he resigned instead). I do owe it to you to share my story though and let you know where I stand.

I don't want to appear as "anti-Mormon". I don't want to be someone trying to convince others, or evangelizing against the Church. Frankly, I'd still fight for the LDS Church if they wanted to hire me again. I'm still against people sharing videos of the sacred LDS temple ceremonies on Youtube. I'm still against ex Mormons trolling Mormons on Mormon blogs. There are many good things the organization itself does, and like any former employer I enjoyed working for I would do it again if for some crazy reason they asked me. I just don't believe in the doctrines any more. Heck - I may even continue sharing my photos with LDS Create, as I have done thus far.

Lastly, I don't want to offend any of you. I know many of you, especially family, see someone who leaves as not going to the Celestial Kingdom. I don't want you to be sad. Frankly, you can try to convert me in the next life if I'm wrong (which I am 100% convinced at this point I am not, nor do I want to argue about it). I'm not a "sinner". I'm not "offended". In fact I'm at peace. I've prayed about it. I've read the Book of Mormon dozens of times. I've sought out the best books and sought the "Mysteries of God". The truth is I was, spiritually and ethically, moving faster than the Church, and this was my only next step in my life (or eternal) progression. I am completely at peace with my direction in life and I'm happier, and healthier than ever and a better person because of it.

As I've always said, this is my faith journey SO FAR. I anticipate this will change more and more in the future. Who knows where I'll be 10 years, or even 20 years down the road? I want you there with me. I want us to all be friends in our individual journeys.

As I've said on Facebook, my mantra is to be true to myself, and kind to others. God or not (I'm still figuring that out), the laws of Karma and the Universe still exist. What we put into this earth we get out of it. I hope you can join me on this journey, whether you're Mormon, non-Mormon, former-Mormon, or otherwise!

Please, reach out and say hi some time - not as a church leader, a home teacher, or visiting teacher, but as a real, true friend. Frankly, I'm not quite sure I can be sure of that if you have any of those callings and come to me, I apologize - I've held the callings myself and I KNOW I wasn't true friends with many of those I was trying to bring back to the Church. I can usually tell your true intentions - building trust with me is really important at this point. I'm hoping to discover who my real friends are from all of this! You can know if I friend you, I now have have none of those motivations - I expect the same.

I'll try to share what I can as I progress on this blog, so please subscribe! Let's all heal, in our own individual journeys, together. And if you're struggling, I'm here to help, no matter which side of the coin you end up on.

The Mormon Church, That BSA Press Release, and the Future of LDS-BSA Relations

Disclosure: while I am a faithful, active member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, a Scout Master, a Wood Badge Staff member ("I used to be a Beaver..."), and having served in almost every Boy Scout leadership position both as a boy and leader, this article in no means represents the opinions or positions of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, nor the Boy Scouts of America. I love both organizations and will be a lifetime actively serving member of both. I only share this to represent some of the feelings of someone who is active in both, and how this affects them.

I've spent a few weeks pondering the words of the recent press release by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints regarding its sudden reversal on Scouting shortly after the BSA National Executive Board made the decision to allow gay leaders within its organization:

"The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is deeply troubled by today’s vote by the Boy Scouts of America National Executive Board. In spite of a request to delay the vote, it was scheduled at a time in July when members of the Church’s governing councils are out of their offices and do not meet. When the leadership of the Church resumes its regular schedule of meetings in August, the century-long association with Scouting will need to be examined. The Church has always welcomed all boys to its Scouting units regardless of sexual orientation. However, the admission of openly gay leaders is inconsistent with the doctrines of the Church and what have traditionally been the values of the Boy Scouts of America.

As a global organization with members in 170 countries, the Church has long been evaluating the limitations that fully one-half of its youth face where Scouting is not available. Those worldwide needs combined with this vote by the BSA National Executive Board will be carefully reviewed by the leaders of the Church in the weeks ahead."

Let's start by getting this out there: while the final paragraph of the above press release rings true, the timing of this press release and the way it was worded with the first paragraph was horribly timed for both the public, and the Church's stance on loving our LGBT neighbors. Now, instead of this being an issue of whether Scouting belongs in the LDS Church in general, it is being lumped together with seeming against the decision of the board itself, making the Church appear bigoted towards the LGBT community. I know this isn't the case. While I'm sure they were frustrated they were left out of the decision making process (something the Church was implying they actually supported before this meeting), I don't think that was their intention or reasoning for "re-evaluating".

In addition, for those of us Scout Masters that were asked to serve (as Mormons the term is "we are called") in a position that rivals Bishop in time spent to properly execute the program, this feels a bit like a slap in the face on all the efforts we've put towards our programs, the time spent faithfully serving in our assigned positions, and time spent implementing "The Patrol Method" and getting trained. Because every boy deserves a trained leader. It came completely out of the blue. I don't think anyone can ever question a loyal Scout Master's sustaining of his church leaders, and that certainly isn't my intention for others to question by my sharing of these thoughts. Trust me - I have better things to do than put my time in as Scout Master, but the time spent sure is worth it for these boys.

Then there are other questions I'm now left hanging with. Am I planning Scout Camp next year? Do I continue with my efforts to implement The Patrol Method? Do I keep encouraging parents and boys to spend exuberant amounts of money on uniforms, books, and patches? I'm kind of left hanging here with the statement above. I love doing these things but because of this statement and nothing to back it up with, I'm left hanging, wondering if I'm wasting my time.

Then there are those that have gone a bit beyond their duty, volunteering, as members of the LDS Church for leadership programs like Wood Badge and other leadership programs. As a staff member this year, we are left wondering if our efforts to train leaders into "servant leaders", teaching boys how to become leaders themselves, are even worth it. And there are definitely those that are second-guessing whether they should be attending Wood Badge at all - I know of more than one participant (personally) that has backed out because of the wording of the press release above.

Now let's talk about the actual issue itself - yes, the way the program is designed currently, as someone who attended Cub Scouts in Indonesia in a non-LDS Scout program, BSA is MUCH better implemented outside LDS units. Let's face it - in the Scout Master's Handbook the first thing it talks about is implementing "The Patrol Method" within a troop. The Patrol Method allows for sub-groups to be organized within the larger Troop, allowing for multiple Patrol Leaders, Assistant Patrol Leaders, Quartermasters, and other positions to exist in a single Troop. The ratio of boys to leaders forces the boys to be in charge, and these troops are much more likely to be "boy-led" troops.

In an LDS Ward-level Troop (the way the program is implemented by default in most LDS BSA programs in the USA), there are very few Wards with enough boys to implement this Patrol method fully. And if it can be implemented now, as boys graduate gradually the unit will be left with too few boys in the future to continue implementing the Patrol Method. It's also very hard to implement a fully-staffed committee in an LDS unit. And LDS units don't take dues so typically have much less money than a typical non-LDS unit does. The fact of the matter is, the way Scouting is supposed to be implemented cannot be implemented effectively in a typical LDS unit.

This could actually be fixed by forcing the default Scouting unit in LDS charters to be at the Stake level instead of the Ward level. This only works in Utah though, where a typical Stake (the larger area consisting of multiple LDS Wards or congregations) is only blocks wide. This would be much more difficult to implement in a non-Utah Stake. Outside Utah the only way to truly be effective would be merging with non-LDS charters in the local area. I can't see the LDS Church doing this any time soon.

So the LDS Church is in an awkward position here. Yes, I believe the press release was rushed and written and pushed to the public at the wrong time, and coupled with the wrong issue. It's NOT an LGBT leadership thing as far as I can tell (even if it seems so). There have been openly gay Scout leaders in LDS units for some time now - at least I have known a few that have been either open or willing to discuss privately. The issue is that the Church just isn't equipped to fully implement the Scouting program the right way.

I think the LDS Church would be better off encouraging its boys as well as 14+ year old age girls (until Scouting allows girls in other branches) to attend non-LDS charters of the BSA. The program still builds boys and still turns them into leaders. Then, inside its own organization it should be focusing on its own "Duty to God" program. It's time to let Scouts be Scouts and Mormons to be Mormons, while co-existing as separate entities. That's pretty much how it works outside the USA.

If not, I'd love to see another, better way to implement The Patrol Method and keep BSA and Mormonism together. I'm lost at what might work right now.

Who Were the Pioneers of #LDSConf? The History of Tweeting During LDS General Conference

Twice a year, Mormons get together to hear words from leaders of the Church (some of them, we call "Prophets" because we believe they have the mantle to communicate directly with God just like Moses, or Elijah, or Peter). You probably know about this if you use Twitter, because each time it almost always trends, and if you have a friend like myself who is Mormon, our posts and unapologetic celebration of the event is pretty hard to avoid. So how did all this hoopla on Twitter, and now places like Facebook, Google+, and Instagram begin? I've spent some time studying the history of it all (it's a blur for me), and here is what I came up with:

#LDSConf

• In August 2007, my friend Chris Messina proposes the use of "hashtags" to organize conversations - his words, "how do you feel about using # (pound) for groups. As in #barcamp [msg]?"
• In September 2007, Twitter launches a feature called "track", enabling users to send "track" followed by any term they want to receive updates by users on via SMS. It was disabled not long after due to growth and scalability needs of the service.
• In July 2008, Twitter acquires the service Summize.com, allowing any Twitter user to search for public Tweets and see results almost in real time. Upon the announcement, Twitter announces the launch of search.twitter.com integration with Summize (previously, after track was disabled, users could only search for other users through Twitter search).
• Some time around August 2008, Twitter integrates links to hashtags that integrate with Twitter search, and launches trending terms showcasing the top terms talked about at any given time.
• October 2008: during the second semi-annual General Conference of the year for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Adam Wride posts, "#ldsconf Getting ready for first session of conference". He follows that with a response to @justin_hart and a few others, "trying to popularize #ldsconf - spread the word". Thus begins the use of #ldsconf during LDS General Conference. You can follow how it all started over on Topsy (just click here).
• My first #ldsconf Tweet was shortly after that after seeing my friend Joel Dehlin (then, I believe, the CIO for the Church) use it: "Are you watching LDS General Conference? Tag with #ldsconf and track what others are saying at http://search.twitter.com"

#TwitterStake

I admit I'm a little fuzzy on the origins of the use of "Twitter Stake", and the hashtag #TwitterStake. I'll admit I'm not even sure what it was or how it came to be, but I get asked about it a lot, and it gets confused with the use of #LDSConf often.

"Twitter Stake" seems to have originated with my friend Kathryn Skaggs around 2009 some time, but I can't find a quote by her that predates the first tweet. The first tweet around #TwitterStake was actually by my cousin, Patti Harvey, in response to @LDSNana (Kathryn Skaggs) not even using the hashtag: "Twitter Stake. I like that! :-)" After that, many more tweets followed using the hashtag #TwitterStake. Here's the breakdown on Twitter.

Acceptance by the Church

The Church was rather slow in adopting #LDSConf. While I worked for the Church, there were concerns amongst those at Headquarters that they didn't want to distract from the messages of leaders, so we started by only posting before and after sessions of conference on varying official accounts. I always saw it as another media channel that could get the message out to so many more people, but like many things at the Church, it takes time to help everyone understand the value of things like this (and there were still many levels between me and those that could make a difference). When I was there, I was offered the Twitter account, @LDSConf, and I believe we secured it at some point while there. No one at the Church wanted to use it though at the time.

In April of 2013 when I worked for Deseret Digital Media, I realized I still had the @LDSConf account, and decided there was an opportunity to use the account to "live-tweet" conference from DeseretNews.com using the new account. We put people from DeseretNews.com and OkEspanol.com (the Hispanic Digital Newspaper that I was in charge of) in the press room at the conference center and live-tweeted conference in both English and Spanish as the first church-owned organization to live-tweet conference (that I know of at least). We also sponsored an ad for the #LDSConf hashtag telling people about the new Twitter account.

Finally, in October of 2013 I'm told the Church started live-tweeting conference during sessions, marking a change in culture surrounding Tweeting during conference sessions.

This Year

This year marks the 6th anniversary of the #LDSConf hashtag. I've noticed the Church has picked up the pace even more in tweeting during conference sessions, and I'm even seeing multiple languages now. Also, last year they started posting memes and other inspirational messages released during talks. The leaders of the Church now have Facebook, Google+, and Twitter accounts and those accounts are being updated regularly during the talks of each leader.

It's humbling to see the things put in place over just the last 6 or 7 years, and to see the steps that we had to go through to truly build a single "village" of Mormons, all communicating worldwide and sharing the Gospel messages from leaders of what we believe to be God's church with each other and our friends. There's still a lot more work that needs to be done, but this has been a fun ride and I can't wait to see where we go as technology continues to evolve!